German grammar tips: How to say ‘you’ in German without sounding rude

In English, we have it easy—whether you’re talking to your grandmother, your boss, or your dog, it’s always you. But in German, choosing the wrong form of you can make you sound too formal, too casual—or just plain impolite.

So… which ‘you’ do you use?

German has three common ways to say you: du, ihr, and Sie. Each one has its own social context, and using the wrong one can feel awkward—or even disrespectful.

du – The informal singular

Use du when speaking to one person you know well: friends, family members, children, and sometimes pets.

Example:
Wie geht es dir? – How are you? (to one person you know well)

Many workplaces are moving toward a casual du culture—but it’s safer to wait to be offered the du first, especially when talking to your colleagues or superiors.

ihr – The informal plural

This is used when speaking informally to two or more people that you would address with du individually. Think of it as “you guys” or “you all”.

Example:
Wisst ihr, wo das Café ist? – Do you guys know where the café is?

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Sie – The formal singular and plural

This is the safest and most polite version, used in formal situations, with strangers, and in most professional or bureaucratic settings. This Sie is always capitalised.

Example:
Wie geht es Ihnen? – How are you? (formal, to one or more people)

Use Sie when addressing your landlord, your doctor, your bank clerk—or anyone in a position of authority unless invited to switch to du.

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Tips for avoiding awkward moments

• When in doubt, use Sie. It’s the polite default in Austria and Germany, especially with people you don’t know.
• Let others offer the du. In a work setting, your manager or older colleague may offer to switch to du. Until then, stick to Sie.
• Don’t mix forms. Switching between du and Sie mid-conversation can sound clumsy. Pick one and stay with it.
• Be aware of context. At the playground, parents might use du with each other. At the tax office? Definitely Sie.

Learning when and how to use these forms takes practice, and even native speakers occasionally get it wrong. But with a bit of listening and confidence, you’ll soon find your footing.

Do you have any German grammar questions? Let us know in the comments below.